Thurman W. Arnold, CFLS

Michael C. Peterson

Welcome to the Enlightened Divorce Blog™

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The Enlightened Divorce Blog™ offers solutions to situations that people commonly encounter in relationship break up, especially in California. My vision is larger than simply to attract clients to our family law firm, although that is my desire too. I hope to help demystify the law and procedures surrounding family court litigation. I also want to share client and interest's centered peacemaking and mediation philosophies and mindfulness pointers, and to explore the best current practices in the mental health sciences that might apply to your circumstances.

The family law search engine (very upper right hand corner of every page) may aid you in finding tips and insights that are relevant to your family law matter. You will find hundreds of articles here. I maintain three websites, and the search engines on each cross over to material on all the others. The other sites are:

I provide a California Family Law Statutes portal, containing over 400 California Family Code sections, along with relevant court rules and other codes. There is commentary about them throughout these sites, including "how-to's" and practice tips.

I also offer a Family Law Forms Page which includes the California Judicial Council mandatory and optional forms with instructions on when and how to use them. I am regularly adding blogs, articles, and other useful materials.

Please feel free to write a comment on any blog - I love to respond to comments, and others may find our discussion useful. Everything you find here is original material; beginning in January, 2013, I am inviting superior legal professionals to contribute Guest Blogs in order to expand the information available to the public.

Please support our efforts by Facebook "Liking" what is of value, and follow us on Twitter!

~ T.W. Arnold III, CFLS ~

attorney wes arnold and his dog jake
Thurman and "Jake" Arnold

Recent Posts

How To COLLECT On Family Court ORDERS For Support or Money Judgments In Property Division!

Indio Family Court Comm. Gregory Olson | Riverside County Family Law Judges

New Cal. Rules of Court, Rule 5.111 - Increasing Litigation Costs Impairs Justice

WEBCAM Divorce and (SECOND OPINION) Family Law Consults!

What Is The "B-BUMP" In SPOUSAL SUPPORT Software Programs?

FLARPLS or Charging Lien In Your Divorce ? | Assuring Continued Quality Legal Representation

RED FLAGS That Imply Your SPOUSE May Be PLANNING To CHEAT You!

I Am UNHAPPY With The FAMILY COURT'S RULING. What Can I Do?

CHRISTIAN Divorce | Summer Suggestions For Teens and Parents Affected By Divorce | SROM

Pre-Marriage TIPS for MEN - Surviving DIVORCE Without A Prenup!

Best FREE Legal Divorce Information | Help Us Help You!

What Should a PRODUCTION DEMAND Request for SUPPORT Purposes? (Part 1)

"Thank You For Leaving Me," by Farhana Dhalla

The Top Local Family Law Attorneys - Is There An Advantage To Hiring One?

Penile LIE DETECTOR Tests: Coming to a FAMILY COURT Near You?

Family Law ADVOCACY TIPS For Lawyers and Self-Represented Parties: The 80-20 Principle!

Can Liability for a Community DEBT Be Assigned to Just One Spouse In a Divorce SETTLEMENT?

Do I Get a Spousal Support Deduction for Payments Made on the Residence Owned With My Wife?

My Wife and I Are Separated. Is Voluntary Spousal Support TAX DEDUCTIBLE?

Pre-UPAA Premarital Agreements and SUPPORT WAIVERS: Marriage of Melissa

How Can I SET ASIDE a SUPPORT ORDER?

IRMO FREITAS: Limitations On Retroactive Support Modifications

My Husband Is Living In Our Home - Doesn't He Owe Something For This?

INVITATION TO PREMIERE LEGAL PROFESSIONALS to Submit GUEST BLOGS!

In Re DRAKE M.: Marijuana Use Is Not Necessarily Abuse

Can I REMOVE and Replace an EC Section 730 Custody Evaluator for BIAS?

Radical Revisions to the Family Law Rules of Court Become Effective Next Month!

Important Family Code Section 2104 Amendment for 2013!

Introduction to UCCJEA (Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act) Issues

The Ten Biggest Mistakes People Make That Impair Their Rights Upon Divorce

ATTORNEY FEE ETHICS - Some Basic Things to Watch For Regarding Family Case Fees and Billings

Dividing JOINTLY TITLED PROPERTY Acquired Before Marriage (or RDP) - Family Law Act or Partition?

Thurman Arnold to Present November, 2012 Workshop to the California Legal Secretaries, Inc. Organization

My APOLOGIES For a Summer of Creative Silence!

A Family Court Judge's Perspective On EFFECTIVE ADVOCACY

TIPS for Drafting Family Court DECLARATIONS

FORGIVING and Divorce: Applying the Forgiveness Principles Espoused By Robert Enright, Ph.D

Divorce and Family Law HORROR STORIES - How the System Is Broken! SHARE Yours With Us?

Is It Proper To Give A GAVRON WARNING Before the Final Judgment Is Entered?

Do California Courts "ADD BACK" DEPRECIATION In Determining Child and Spousal Support?

Judicial Council Releases New Rules of Court for CHILD TESTIMONY Re CUSTODY PREFERENCES

MARITAL BALANCE SHEET Programs and Free Divorce Calculators

How To COLLECT ARREARS For CHILD and SPOUSAL SUPPORT?

RE-ELECT JUDGE JAMES COX - Best Riverside County Judges, 2012 Election

FORM 8332 NOW MANDATORY TO CLAIM DEPENDENCY EXEMPTIONS

How Do I PROTECT Monies Loaned By MY FAMILY For LOANS I Use For ATTORNEY FEES?

How Are BUSINESSES Owned Before Marriage DIVIDED In Divorce?

What Does the Term "Marital Standard of Living (MSL)" Mean?

What Happens If I Place My Wife's Name On Title to My Home and We Later Divorce?

What Happens In Divorce When One Spouse Owned A Residence At the Date of Marriage?

GAVRON WARNINGS and SPOUSAL Support - What Self-Represented Parties Should Know!

Family Court EVIDENCE Rules - What Is HEARSAY?

Court Upholds PRENUPTIAL AGREEMENT Where Wife Alleged Husband Falsely Stated Net Worth

What Is the MARITAL PRIVILEGE in California Family Law and When Does It Apply to Testimony?

If DATE OF SEPARATION Is Contested, What Do Courts Look At?

Attorney Michael C. Peterson Speaks About FINANCIAL TRANSPARENCY (Before and Once Divorce Happens)

Attorney Michael C. Peterson JOINS the Law Firm of Thurman W. Arnold!

2nd Appellate District Severely Limits GRANDPARENT VISITATION Under Family Code Section 3102

Wife Bears Own ATTORNEY FEES In Failed SET ASIDE MOTION Involving MSA

Proposed 2012 REVISIONS to JUDICIAL COUNCIL FORMS; ATTORNEY FEE REQUESTS

GRANDPARENT RIGHTS: Recent RIVERSIDE Case Orders VISITATION To GP After DEATH OF PARENT

DEVIATING From "Guideline" (Presumptively Correct) CHILD SUPPORT in HIGH EARNER Cases

SECOND OPINIONS With THURMAN W. ARNOLD - Honest Feedback on Family Law Matters

Marriage of MARGULIS - Fiduciary Duties of MANAGING SPOUSES

Thurman Arnold Comments Featured in August, 2011, CALIFORNIA LAWYER MAGAZINE

IRMO MARGULIS - Managing Spouse Has BURDEN OF PROOF To Explain MISSING ASSETS

Divorce and Family Lawyers Who LIE - EQUANIMITY and DIVORCE PRACTICE

APPLE LION and VMWare- Upgrading Your Virtual Computer to Run Flawlessly With the New OS X

Can I CONTINUE My DIVORCE TRIAL?

The MINUTE ORDER In My Case Differs From What The JUDGE SAID But My Ex Says We Must Follow It - What Can I Do?

I Am Filing for Divorce and Believe My Spouse is Hiding Funds in a SAFE DEPOSIT BOX. What Can I Do?

Recovering UNINSURED HEALTH COSTS as Additional CHILD SUPPORT

Pointers for Dealing With FAMILY COURT JUDGES (Difficult and Otherwise) - What Every Lawyer and PRO PER Should Know!

Court Upholds SPOUSAL SUPPORT WAIVER In PRENUPTIAL AGREEMENT

Announcing the Launch of LAFMS - DIVORCE and FAMILY LAW MEDIATION in Los Angeles and Beverly Hills!

FORM OF TITLE Trumps COMMUNITY PROPERTY PRESUMPTION Where Life Insurance Is An Asset in DIVORCE

RECURRING GIFTS From Parents May Be "INCOME" For Purposes of Determining Need for ATTORNEY FEES!

Marriage of Davenport: Trial Court SANCTIONS Wife Under FC Section 271 for Her ATTORNEYS' "UNBRIDLED AGGRESSION" In Family Court Proceedings!

San Diego Trial Court REVERSED (Again) in MOVE-AWAY Case

Announcing the REVENGE of ELKINS - How Family Courts Are Making Your DIVORCE More Expensive Than Ever Before!

I Have DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Restraining Orders Against My Child's Mother: The Family Court Services Mediator Recommended a Week Off/Week On VISITATION Schedule. Is This Right?

271 SANCTIONS Ordered Against PRO PER ATTORNEY - Lawyers Are Some of the Most Conflicted Parties to Matrimonial Litigation

Local Businesses: Who Is the Best Audio/TV Specialist in Palm Springs?

Are WORKER'S COMPENSATION BENEFITS Community Property? Yes and No!

Announcing Rattlesnake Season as Officially Open in Palm Springs!~

San Diego Trial Court REVERSED for Failing to Exercise An "INFORMED DISCRETION" in Refusing to Permit Sole Legal Custody Father Who Had PRIMARY PHYSICAL CUSTODY to MOVE OUT OF STATE

Marriage of Fong | 271 SANCTIONS | Burden to Prove Ability to Pay

I Have My Ex-Husband's EMAIL PASSWORD and Found Email That Proves His INABILITY TO PARENT - How Do I Present This to the Family Court?

What Is the TIME LIMIT For Filing a RESPONSIVE or REPLY DECLARATION in Family Law Proceedings?

TAX TIME Advice for SEPARATED COUPLES About JOINT TAX RETURNS

Overcoming the PRESUMPTION Against SPOUSAL SUPPORT in DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Cases

For Attorneys Only: Announcing LEGAL WEBSITE OPTIMIZATION By AttorneyWebWizard.com

What to Do If My CASE Is Being TRANSFERRED BETWEEN COURTS in Riverside County?

Local Businesses: Who Has the Best CHINESE FOOD in Palm Springs?

FAMILY LAW SANCTIONS and DUE PROCESS: Santa Barbara Trial Court Reversed in IRMO DURIS

Making DIVORCE JUDGES ACCOUNTABLE - What Is A STATEMENT OF DECISION?

How Do I DISQUALIFY The JUDGE Assigned to My Case?

SANCTIONS For Failure to Complete the FINAL DECLARATION OF DISCLOSURE

Must I Submit My TAX RETURNS to the COURT or to the OTHER PARTY?

Alternatives to Family Court and the Challenge of Mediating Cases With Strong Emotions

MEDIATION Is a BETTER ALTERNATIVE To FAMILY COURT For Some

We Married As a California SAME-SEX Couple But Since I Have Completed My SEX-CHANGE OPERATION.

2011 REVISIONS to the California FAMILY CODE: "CHILD CUSTODY RECOMMENDING COUNSELORS"

What Are TRACINGS In California DIVORCE Proceedings? Tossed Salad and Mixed Vegetables!

Which COURT REPORTING FIRM Do You Recommend in the Coachella Valley?

Ontario, Canada Trial Court Finds PARENTAL ALIENATION - An Example of How Not To Behave!

REPUTABLE APPRAISERS in the PALM SPRINGS VICINITY: Appraising RESIDENCE in DIVORCE

IS LEGISLATION NEEDED To Redefine "GROSS INCOME" Under Family Code Section 4085?

2011 REVISIONS to the California Family Code: Child Abuse and Temporary Orders

2011 REVISIONS to the California Family Code: Serving POST-JUDGMENT OSC's and MOTIONS

ELLEN KELLNER'S CO-PARENTING BOOK Inspired Me: How Can I Get My Ex Into Counseling?

ATTORNEY FEES In CUSTODY Cases: 2011 Family Code Amendments

Making Attorneys Accessible to Family Law Litigants: 2011 ATTORNEY FEE REVISIONS TO THE FAMILY CODE

ELKINS and New FAMILY CODE SECTION 217: How It AFFECTS YOU!

New Family Code Section 3042 - Will It Serve to Accelerate the GENDER CUSTODY WARS?

Can My CHILDREN TESTIFY About Their PARENT PREFERENCE in Our Custody Case?

What STANDARDS Are JUDGES Likely to APPLY When A REQUEST FOR CHILD TESTIMONY Is Made?

The TIME PERIODS for FILING SET ASIDE MOTIONS DEPENDS....

WHY Should I Consider a LEGAL SEPARATION?

Is It Possible to Get My Ex's TAX RETURNS Without Any MOTION to MODIFY Pending Between Us?

What Do I Do to Protect My Community Interest In PERS and STRS RETIREMENT PLANS?

How Can I STOP My Spouse From LIQUIDATING OUR COMMUNITY PENSION?

Are STOCK OPTIONS COMMUNITY PROPERTY?

JAKE ARNOLD Turns SIX!

How Long Do DOMESTIC PARTNERS Have to Wait to DISSOLVE Their Partnership?

How Do I Get An Order for ATTORNEY FEES in a COMPLEX CASE?

Our Disso is Final But We Never Changed the JOINT TENANCY DEEDS. My Ex Just DIED.

What does "COMMUNITY PROPERTY WITH RIGHT OF SURVIVORSHIP" Mean?

TIPS on How to CONTINUE a SUPPORT HEARING and Buy Time

How Do I Use a MARITAL BALANCE SHEET to Figure Out How to Best DIVIDE OUR PROPERTY?

I Have Been Paying the MORTGAGE Since SEPARATION - Am I Entitled to WATTS CREDITS?

My Ex Has Been EXCLUSIVELY USING Our RESIDENCE - Is There an EPSTEIN CREDIT For This?

How Does DOMESTIC VIOLENCE Affect My SPOUSAL SUPPORT OBLIGATIONS?

How Can I Be Sure a Court Will Enforce My AGREEMENT Reached With My Spouse OUT OF COURT?

Am I Entitled to Obtain DISCOVERY If I File a SET ASIDE MOTION Before the Matter is Decided?

My Wife is Living With a Male Renter - Does This Affect My SUPPORT OBLIGATION?

How Are Funds in a JOINT BANK ACCOUNT Treated in Dissolution or Legal Separation?

ENFORCING SUPPORT: What is a REAL PROPERTY LIEN?

How do CALIFORNIA COURTS divide EDUCATION LOANS?

When Is It Possible to Keep the FAMILY RESIDENCE From Being Sold?

How are DEFINED CONTRIBUTION PLANS divided in California DIVORCE?

How Are DEFINED BENEFIT PLANS divided in California Divorce?

How Do I DISQUALIFY a Judge From Hearing My Case?

What do I do if my spouse or domestic partner does not complete their DECLARATION OF DISCLOSURE?

DISCOVERY - How are DEPOSITIONS used in California FAMILY LAW and DIVORCE cases? (Part I)

DISCOVERY in California Marital Proceedings - What Are Requests for Admission?

What is DISCOVERY in California Dissolution and Family Law Cases? (Part 1 - Form Interrogatories)

What is a SUMMARY DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIP DISSOLUTION?

Is a PRENUPTIAL AGREEMENT signed without an attorney ENFORCEABLE?

Does MOORE MARSDEN appy to IMPROVEMENTS we made to our RESIDENCE during marriage?

What should I know if I want to LIMIT or TERMINATE SPOUSAL SUPPORT in the future?

What is a GAVRON WARNING and how does it affect my right to SPOUSAL SUPPORT?

"PARENTAL ALIENATION" at the 2010 AFCC Conference

Proposed Text for a new diagnosis of PARENTAL ALIENATION in the DSM-V

I thought my PARTNER had REGISTERED our DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIP but she says she didn't. Do I have rights?

Announcing the Opening of DESERT FAMILY MEDIATION SERVICES!

What is FAMILY SUPPORT?

What METHODS are used for VALUING BUSINESSES in divorce?

What is HEAD OF HOUSEHOLD status for IRS purposes?

Must I file a JOINT TAX RETURN if we are not yet divorced?

What are the TAX CONSEQUENCES of CHILD SUPPORT and SPOUSAL SUPPORT?

When are ASSETS VALUED for purposes of DIVISION in a California DISSOLUTION?

My husband was HOSPITALIZED after we SEPARATED; am I liable for the bill?

What do I do about SPOUSAL SUPPORT if my ex-spouse is COHABITING with another man?

Is there any way to request that the Judge RECONSIDER her rulings in my case?

What are EPSTEIN REIMBURSEMENTS?

What does it mean that a judge has ordered a 730 EVALUATION in my custody case?

When do SOCIAL SECURITY BENEFITS commence after divorce?

Are SOCIAL SECURITY benefits income for purposes of SUPPORT calculations?

What SOCIAL SECURITY BENEFITS may be paid to CHILDREN?

What SOCIAL SECURITY BENEFITS are paid upon the DEATH of a SPOUSE after DIVORCE

SOCIAL SECURITY BENEFITS and REMARRIAGE for divorced spouses

Will California recognize a SAME SEX MARRIAGE from Vermont?

Do I need a COHABITATION AGREEMENT?

How Do I Get the Court to Order My Husband to be HAIR FOLLICLE tested?

Will the Court DRUG TEST My Wife?

How Do I Defend a Request by My (Former) Spouse to SET ASIDE our Support Orders?

What Are My Rights When I Believe My Spouse Committed Fraud in Their Income & Expense Statement?

What happens to FEES I deposited if I FIRE my ATTORNEY?

What happens to the FEES I give an ATTORNEY?

What is a Family Law Retainer Agreement?

I've heard that CHILDREN can state their PREFERENCE at 13....

How do COURTS decide to award JOINT CUSTODY?

When can I file for LEGAL SEPARATION in CALIFORNIA?

How do I FIRE my ATTORNEY?

When I get MARRIED, how do I avoid my husband's DEBT?

Am I LIABLE for my husband's NURSING HOME DEBT?

Am I LIABLE for my husband's GAMBLING DEBTS?

Q. Who is liable for debts that we assign between us in our divorce settlement?

DCSS INTERCEPTED my TAX REFUND with my new Husband.

What is GUIDELINE SUPPORT in California?

I am remarried. How does my NEW MATE'S INCOME affect my SPOUSAL SUPPORT or CHILD SUPPORT OBLIGATION?

What does a VOLUNTARY DECLARATION OF PATERNITY (VDOP) do in California?

Is a WAIVER OF SPOUSAL SUPPORT in a PRENUP VALID?

BIFURCATION of MARITAL STATUS

Overcoming PARENTING CONFLICTS With OURFAMILYWIZARD.COM

OVERVIEW OF CUSTODY APPLICATIONS AND PROCEDURES in California

PRELIMINARY DECLARATION OF DISCLOSURE in California (PDD's)

FORM 8332 is required to release DEPENDENCY EXEMPTIONS to Father awarded deduction!

Who OWES CHILD SUPPORT?

Can CHILD SUPPORT ORDERS be made RETROACTIVE?

How long does a CHILD SUPPORT OBLIGATION continue?

My ex wife has twice taken the DEPENDENCY EXEMPTION. I am supposed to get alternate years.

How does one begin to become MINDFUL during DIVORCE?

What should I do before selecting a divorce attorney?

Am I LIABLE for my husband's CHILD SUPPORT ARREARS from his first marriage?

Are my EARNINGS during marriage LIABLE for my spouse's PREMARRIAGE DEBTS?

Am I liable for my husband's BUSINESS DEBTS?

My Wife caused a CAR ACCIDENT. Am I LIABLE too?

Must I pay any of my husband's STUDENT LOAN if we DIVORCE?

If my Wife and I are separated, do I have to pay the CREDIT CARDS she ran up after leaving?

Am I LIABLE for my spouse's PREMARITAL DEBT?

Why is the date of PHYSICAL SEPARATION legally important?

What Is a LEGAL SEPARATION in California?

What are interspousal FIDUCIARY DUTIES?

I have an attorney but what if I want a SECOND OPINION?

My wife she used her INHERITANCE to buy our home. We are getting divorced.

My Husband Is Receiving A PERSONAL INJURY SETTLEMENT. Am I Entitled To Any of It?

My New Wife Works. Can this NEW MATE INCOME Be Used to Increase my CHILD SUPPORT?

How Are SOCIAL SECURITY benefits Treated In DIVORCE?

What is permanent SPOUSAL SUPPORT in California?

How is TEMPORARY SPOUSAL SUPPORT Determined in California?

ENFORCING SUPPORT ORDERS in California

GRANDPARENT CUSTODY in California.

How Do I CHANGE VENUE in a divorce?

Domestic Violence and SHELTER FROM THE STORM

Idaho Trial Court Rules that Mother Cannot Move to Michigan, Even Without the Kids!

I am a COMMON LAW spouse under Canadian law. We have been living in California for 4 years and acquired property.

Is OVERTIME considered in fixing CHILD SUPPORT?

Can you give me a MOORE MARSDEN Analysis on My SEPARATE PROPERTY HOME?

I want to hire a NEW ATTORNEY with money my husband was ordered to pay my last lawyer.

How does my sister get CUSTODY of her GRANDSON?

My girlfriend is due to have a baby next month. I am not sure if it mine. What do I do?

Joint legal and sole physical custody Mom needs help.

This Blog is intended to be informational, and its use or a response by me to inquiries from you do not establish or constitute an attorney-client relationship with our firm. Use of this website is subject to the terms of our DISCLAIMER. The contents of this Blog do not and cannot predict any outcome in your case, and our comments should not be considered as controlling or even correct as to your particular facts and situation. Each case must be analyzed on its own merits and California Family Law is constantly changing and evolving! We urge you to seek competent legal advice in your community specific to your circumstances.

Thurman Arnold is available to consult with and to advise Californians by Webcam

(including Discreet Second Opinions)

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The information on this website is for general information purposes only. Nothing on this site should be taken as legal advice for any individual case or situation. This information on this website is not intended to create, and receipt or viewing of this information does not constitute, an attorney-client relationship.

Address: 225 South Civic Drive Suite 1-3 Palm Springs, CA 92262 Phone: (760) 320-7915

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