Recent Posts in Marriage Category

First, I'm assuming that Patricia B. is your birth name, or that you had previously obtained a name change whether by court decree or prior marriage. I say this because Family Code section 354 (dealing with marriage licenses) requires a photo ID that accurately lists your given or subsequently legal name so I expect that is what you presented to obtain the license.

Second, your existing marriage to Jill is valid at least as of the date of marriage, for all statewide applications under California law. It is hard to imagine that your post-marriage gender operations (and hence post-marriage gender status as a male) in any way changes that. It makes me wonder what happens to an opposite sex couple where one subsequently completes the procedures that you have undertaken (i.e., opposite genders marry, but then one changes their gender so they are both now the same-sex) - would that invalidate the marriage?  Complicated stuff.

Third, no California statute speaks to gendered changed individuals as qualifying as a man (in your case) for purposes of marriage, where they were born as a woman, for purposes of Family Code 300 or the amendment to the California constitution (Proposition 8) that occurred after your marriage. This means to me that it would require an appellate decision (or legislative enactment) to provide such authority and I can't tell you of any specific California case that has so found but, again, I've not researched it in detail. If California does accept your sex change as legally making you a male this would improve your position under federal law, discussed below. Do you have an affidavit from your doctor verifying that the surgery changed your sex designation? Have you investigated amending your birth certificate? I recommend it. The legal viability of sex change is a matter for states to determine, according to the 10th Amendment of the United States Constitution. 

Fourth, I would be concerned that dissolving your existing marriage without a clear understanding of these issues could place you at risk in the sense that, at least as of today, you can't remarry Jill IF you are legally a woman. Hence, I would be very careful about dissolving your existing marriage. You would have exactly the same rights in California as a same-sex married couple as you would as domestic partners. However, if you dissolved the marriage, didn't entered into a RDP, and then some court ruled later that your remarriage was not legally valid you would have no legal status other than possibly as a "putative" domestic partner or spouse. This could negatively impact your legal rights and responsibilities, and increase litigation costs, should the relationship end.

Fifth, at this time, federal law especially as it relates to tax filing status, isn't bound by any state's statutes and doesn't recognize same-sex marriage for that purpose and a number of others. This results from the Federal Defense of Marriage Act and a history of gender prejudice, among other things.

I also don't know whether federal law recognizes the gender change as making you a male since your sex-change operation (but it might, as discussed above). I am aware of at least one federal administrative case that suggests that if California recognizes your sex change operation, you might qualify as an opposite gendered person under federal law at least for some purposes (i.e., interpreting immigration rules and statutes per In Re Lovo-Lara).

Sixth, I can't see how remarrying under your new name, and post-surgery, would add anything to the mix, legally speaking.  You have changed your name and so Jill is now married to Alex. The only area where it seems it might matter from a legal perspective is qualifying for some status or benefits under federal law. It doesn't add anything in California for you to divorce and remarry under your current name and gender. I recognize you haven't asked about federal legal status and this may be irrelevant to you, and I don't pretend to be an expert on federal law.

______________

I cannot resist speaking to your situation as a metaphor for all of us. My belief is that until we each expand beyond our myopic judgments of what others should choose for themselves our internecine cultural, gender, familial, racial and nationalistic struggles will escalate. Mind you, any student of human history knows that such is part of our collective personality structure - that we ban together against 'outsiders' to protect our group - and possibly this trait is even a reason for our success as a species thus far, if not for the "others" who were sacrificed. In an increasingly crowded and heterogeneous world the things that worked before may presently assure our common peril.

Pioneering such as yours challenges us to rethink our biases, and sometimes even to consider that they might only be artificial points of view 'full of fit and fury, signifying nothing.' We can just as easily hold a belief with righteous self-certainty one day only to hold its opposite to be true with equal earnestness the next (or simply recognize that we were mistaken in the first instance). In my experience as a family attorney who has listened to countless individuals express what they think went wrong with their marriage or domestic partner, and in the course of my own life, I am always humbled how little we and I know 'for sure' and how the "truth" shifts from moment to moment. When we misplace humility we tend to become fixated on forcing others conform to our expectations - inevitably leading to conflict. 

Our brains may actually be hard-wired to hold biases. Most people recognize they have little control over the thoughts that pop into our minds. I suspect that we don't lose biases as an effort of will, but instead that they fall away as part of a larger process. Until they do fall away, the trick may be simply to remember to distrust these thoughts and not to believe they are true simply because they arose. Certainly that strategy might relieve the emotional component to prejudice.

All beings desire peace, and freedom. May each of us find it in our own way. But perhaps the web of our interdependence requires that we allow others to do so, first..., I don't know, dear reader. What makes sense to you?

    "(a) At a hearing on any order to show cause or notice of motion brought pursuant to this code, absent a stipulation of the parties or a finding of good cause pursuant to subdivision (b), the court shall receive any live, competent testimony that is relevant and within the scope of the hearing and the court may ask questions of the parties.

    (b) In appropriate cases, a court may make a finding of good cause to refuse to receive live testimony and shall state its reasons for the finding on the record or in writing. The Judicial Council shall, by January 1, 2012, adopt a statewide rule of court regarding the factors a court shall consider in making a finding of good cause.

    (c) A party seeking to present live testimony from witnesses other than the parties shall, prior to the hearing, file and serve a witness list with a brief description of the anticipated testimony.

If the witness list is not served prior to the hearing, the court may, on request, grant a brief continuance and may make appropriate temporary orders pending the continued hearing."

Family Code section 217 will cause a sea-change in day to day family court proceedings across our state, unless family court judicial officers ignore it to the limited extent possible by court rules.  It will likely have immense financial and resource consequences upon not only the courts but upon parties to family court proceedings.  It will force the state government in coming years to study whole new paradigms for resolving divorce and domestic partnership dissolution outside the adversary template, including those currently practiced in New Zealand and southern Australia. 

It will also pressure parties to consider mediation, and collaborative processes which occur outside congested courthouses, much more carefully.  The costs of adversary litigation are about to sky-rocket, making mediation even more appealing from a financial perspective (I have written extensively about the emotional and psychological benefits here an elsewhere).  There simply is no governmental money available to absorb the coming Elkins Onslaught. For more information about an alternative method for resolving family disputes, please visit us at www.DesertFamilyMediationServices.com.
  
At the same time, at least in the short run taken together with some of the other revisions that become effective next month, it may encourage more people to litigate more stubbornly and so make mediation seem less attractive than it did before the changes (just the reverse will be true).  Some folks will mistakenly assume that this invites the use of court hearings as a live-testimony forum for sharing unresolved complaints relating to their marriage or domestic partnership dissolution with the other party in open court.  Instead, judges will sustain objections to such irrelevant material and parties who seek to use Family Court as a platform to air relationship grievances will find themselves alienating the trier of fact in ways that will have adverse consequences to them beyond just the time and expense of the exercise. 

The purpose of today's Blog is to introduce you to section 217 and the new changes.  I will follow up with more articles in coming weeks.  Without a doubt the new rules will make all the information I provide on my websites more relevant and timely for my readers. 

Q.     If I marry is it possible to avoid any of my fiance's debt liability?

A.  Yes.  First, your separate property doesn't become liable for a spouse's premarital debt simply by marrying.  But community property as it comes into being does. 

Secondly, to the extent you or your spouse will incur debt during marriage, prior to marriage both can agree to eliminate or restrict the creation of community property as between you. This is accomplished through a prenuptial or premarital agreement.  Essentially you agree to restrict or eliminate the creation of community property in the first instance, since that will remain liable for debts incurred prior to (with some exceptions) and during the marriage, and so you can ensure that your separate property remains protected. 

None of this applies to debts you jointly incur - the joint credit card, the jointly purchased car, or the jointly refinanced home.  This is why creditors try to insist that both spouses sign loans. 

But you can modify your behavior in order to protect yourself by not signing. It is possible to enter a post-nuptial agreement which achieves substantially the same thing, although it won't necessarily change the character of debt incurred prior to its signing but it may nonetheless eliminate future community debt by eliminating community property.  Remember, as between the two of you, you cannot affect third party's rights who are not parties to your post marital agreement, and to do so may be considered a fraud upon creditors which means the agreement may be set aside and voided.